I’m So Damn Itchy. Why Do Mosquitos Keep Biting Me And Not You?
Spring and summer are the favorite seasons for many folks in the Quad Cities. However, many suffer from an affliction known as "mosquitous attractness". OK, that is not a real thing. But for those of us that get bit while others are fine, it sure feels real. While the name is made up, the affliction is real.
These awful bugs are nothing new to me.
Friday and Saturday night (May 13 and 14) I enjoyed some awesome live and local music at the Rock Island County Fairgrounds. Midwest Monster Fest Halfway to Halloween Celebration had Alborn, The Forty Twos, and Elisium on Friday and St. October and NonGrata on Saturday. The music and people were great. But every mosquito within a mile radius found me.
The first night I got a couple but overall not that bad. The next morning I realized it was worse than I thought with bites on my arms and legs. Saturday was a different story. But really the same story for me.
I tried to stay and watch as much as I could but I just couldn't. I would have lost a pint of blood. Everyone else was fine. Not me! Legs, arms, feet, head. They were all over me.
At one point I saw Chino from Devour The Sun laughing as I swatted the little buggers away. He said, "I looked like I was starting the next TikTok dance" with how much I was moving to swat them off me. At one point I walked to a group of three others that were standing there perfectly fine and when I got there, I instantly had 4 of them on my legs.
Mosquitos can be dangerous.
For the most part, mosquitos are annoying when they are on you and annoying for days after as you itch parts of your body you shouldn't be itching. And while we in the Quad Cities don't have to worry about the major diseases that can be transmitted by mosquitos in our area, you just never know.
- Dengue Fever
- Zika Infection
We might be "safe" from these diseases for now, but how long until it finds its way to the midwest? We need Thanos to not just snap 50% of them away, but all of them away.
What can you do to prevent mosquitos?
Of course, the obvious answer here is to stay indoors. But that sucks. We fight through the cold-ass Midwest winter just for these 4 months of being outside. Mosquitos are bad, sitting inside on a nice day is even worse.
Preventing the little insects from even being born is always a good preventative measure. So be sure to not have any standing water where they can breed more of their blood-sucking offspring.
Then of course there is covering yourself in mosquito repellent. Anything with DEET is going to be the most effective. However, you also are dumping chemicals all over your body that may or may not cause problems down the road.
So instead use a natural repellent. Maybe not as effective, but you'll smell better than the chemicals when you apply things like:
- Lemon oil
- Cinnamon oil
- Thyme oil
- Soybean oil (feel like this is best for the midwest)
- Tea tree oil
None of those smells work for you? OK, how about Victoria's Secret Bombshell perfume. Yeah, the perfume will help keep mosquitos away for up to 2 hours. Ladies, this should work for you. Fellas, make sure it's also what your lady is wearing or you may have some explaining to do.
So why do mosquitos choose you over the person next to you?
According to research, 20% of people are more appetizing to mosquitos. If you are one of them, this could be one, or many, of the reasons why.
Drinking a 12-ounce beer makes some people more appealing to mosquitos. But what if I drink five 12-ounce beers? Will that make them more attracted, less attracted, or just get them drunk when they do take my blood. Might have to experiment with this one.
Type O Blood
If you have type O blood you are 2x more likely to have mosquitos try to bite you. Mosquitos can actually smell what type of blood you are and choose if they want your blood or not. So we are like a freakin buffet for them and they are looking for the steak, not the salad.
This one is going to be tough. We rock. We were black. Unless of course, you bought one of the other colors of our shirts. But for the most part, we were black...even in the summer.
Some of you might have to worry about this. Not me. So moving on.
More Carbon Dioxide
Ok, this one actually is kind of the same as exercise. But for some of us, it doesn't matter if we are working up a sweat, we just apparently have more carbon dioxide leaving us as we breathe, and the mosquitos like it.
I know, shocking right. But, if you are preggers in the summer, get ready for more bites to come your way. This goes back to the CO2 effect.
What are your spring and summer plans?
So there you go. If you don't want mosquito bites this summer stay inside, spray yourself with Victoria's Secret perfume, don't drink beer, wear white clothes, don't exercise, and don't get pregnant.
Good luck. I'll see you on the patio while I drink a beer in my black t-shirt smacking them off my legs and arms and enjoying the summer heat.
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